My friend Christy has asked me to describe how she can prepare herself for that great change from singleness to married woman. I have thought a lot about this, trying to think what wonderful words of advice I might have. After all, I have been married 21 years this month--I ought to know something, right?
Actually, I often think I am just learning. I look back on my marriage and see so much failure that could have been avoided had I prepared myself spiritually, mentally, emotionally, even physically instead of thinking that there would not be much difference between my life as a single person and my life as a married woman.
Lately I have been meditating on the woman described in Proverbs 31:10-31 in an attempt to make my life more like hers. So I thought I'd do a series on her.
Proverbs 31:10 -- "Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies."
I want to focus on the word virtuous for this post. Literally, in the Hebrew, this means a woman of strength. The word translated virtuous in this verse as also been translated might, power, strength, valiant. It has been used in a military sense as army, great forces, host, company. So we are talking about one strong woman here.
I like what Matthew Henry has to say about this, so I am going to quote him here:
[She is]...a woman of strength..., though the weaker vessel, yet made strong by wisdom and grace, and the fear of God....A virtuous woman is a woman of spirit, who has the command of her own spirit and knows how to manage other people's, one that is pious and industrious, and a help meet for a man....A virtuous woman is a woman of resolution, who, having espoused good principles, is firm and steady to them, and will not be frightened with winds and clouds from any part of her duty....
The first thing a woman needs if she would be a godly wife, then, is strength of character. On a related note, we women are sometimes subject to mood swings. Biblically, those mood swings ought to be subject to us. This is part of having the command of our own spirits. You might find it helpful to read this post about mood swings.